kband: bluprnt 4 rvolution

date attempt

So, I had yet another lavalife date last night. This guy seemed bland but OK, cute, smart, blablabla. I dressed up all typical girl pretty. I’m wore a shirt that was not really low cut, but the top buttons were unbuttoned. (I know that seems like info you didn’t need but keep it in mind). So anyways we meet at this restaurant for dessert in the evening and I suggest we sit outside. We walk outside and, I am not sure, but I think I feel a moth fly down my shirt. We sit down at a table. It’s all very formal and professional. I am not really listening to anything the guy is saying because I am trying to figure out if there is a moth in my shirt. It is far too early in the date to run to the washroom and once in a while I definitely feel a fluttering. The conversation is bland and I begin weighing casually scratching my chest and smashing the moth. But I sort of felt bad for the moth and it was not possible to process moral calculations and small talk at the same time.

Suddenly the conversation turns political and he tells me about how the concept of “precedence” in law is really on of the basic flaws of the American legal system. I actually watched him morph from a typical bland guy into a really cute smart guy. It is at this same moment that I realize that there is a chance that the moth could actually fly out from my chest and this would be completely unacceptable. I would not date someone from whom moths few out, I could not expect that he would either. But of course the whole situation is really funny and the moth is tickling me and I start snickering at the most inappropriate moments.

At one point he asks me why I am on a date with him and not any of the other desperate people on lavalife and I just lose it. The moth decides to freak out and I almost fell off my chair laughing. I can’t imagine what he was thinking but of course I had to say, “Listen, Mike, I have to tell you something… There’s a moth in my shirt.” He stares blankly at me and I start laughing even more. I pull down my shirt and the moth is perched perfectly on my right breast and it flies away towards the light. I’m in hysterics of course and he’s saying something about “If you’re not embarrassed, I’m not embarrassed for you.” In the end, it was a nice professional date, more like a job interview than anything. But he was interesting and I think we’ll hang out again. Alas, the only one who got any action was of course the moth.